From Loss to Life

This blog is written by SIDS America co-founder, Cheryl Darnell, whose son Billy died from SIDS. The thoughts reflected here come from Cheryl's heart to encourage others who are also experiencing the death of a child from SIDS. Her desire is that you might find hope and healing through her words and know that you are not alone.

Cheryl Darnell

For all mothers who have suffered the death of a child to SIDS....

While many moms blissfully relish in the joys of motherhood today, there are also many mothers who face this day feeling empty, surrounded by empty.....empty arms, empty carseat, empty nursery, empty heart. How, you may be wondering, does a grieving mother possibly "celebrate" Mother's Day?

To answer that, it helps to look at a significant truth about becoming a mother.

God says in the following passages:

Jeremiah 1:5: Before I formed you in the womb I knew you, before you were born I set you apart...

Psalm 139:13-16: For You created my inmost being; You knit me together in my mother’s womb. I praise You because I am fearfully and wonderfully made; Your works are wonderful, I know that full well. My frame was not hidden from You when I was made in the secret place. When I was woven together in the depths of the earth, Your eyes saw my unformed body. All the days...

Cheryl Darnell
Mother's Day

An email was sent to me last year by the aunt of a precious baby girl who died of SIDS in April 2009. She was asking for advice on what to say to the baby's parents. It was Mother's Day weekend, and the aunt told me, "I feel an extra layer of sadness that (the baby's mommy) will be suffering this weekend- her first Mother's Day....I want to acknowledge that she is a wonderful Mom.....but I don't know if it would be better to let the holiday go by 'un-announced.'"

Especially for those of you who have suffered the death of your first and only child, you might feel so empty and sad on Mother's Day. You may question whether you still qualify for recognition on this day. But no more does the absence of your child here on earth mean you're not a mother than does the absence of one's parent mean he/she is no longer that parent's son or daughter.

From the moment of conception, life grew inside you, and you became a mother. The nurturing and love you provided your baby in the...